Monday, September 06th, 2010. ESN.
President Barack Obama spoke about the importance of understanding and tolerance in American society this morning, at the cornerstone ceremony of a new peace mosque, which will soon be built on top of the White House.
“America is the greatest country in the world of Allah.” said the president, while baring a perfect row of white teeth at Journalists.
“And it is my honor as the current ‘first Dhimmi’ to show its dedication to freedom, by submitting to the will of a foreign political power.”
Also speaking at the ceremony was Imam Rafik-Al-Achflachashtani, representative of the ‘obliteration of all infidels initiative’ – the organization behind the mosque, which is funded by Wahhabist Saudis, as well as various Islamic charity groups, such as “Feed the poor with automatic weapons”, and “Cut that clitoris” – the pro-life advocates who object to abortions, and female orgasms worldwide.
The Imam referred to the mosque as ‘the tower of conquest’, and said it was a great beginning of mutual understanding for both cultures.
“You insensitive brutes have to learn that Muslims are very insecure people, who can only feel good about themselves by oppressing every other group on the planet.”
He then added, in Arabic, “soon we shall crush you all under our heel, like a sweaty old man deflowering his 12-year-old niece”.
Upon hearing these words, several prominent liberal advisers to president Obama, including Hillary Clinton, have reportedly wept, explaining later that they could only imagine the sort of loving message he expressed in that threatening tone.
When asked whether she would like a translation, Mrs. Clinton replied “Why? I’ve never bothered to listen to what Muslims said before, and I’m certainly not going to start now.”