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Posts Tagged ‘telephone’

Spoof of Lady Gaga and Beyonce’s Telephone

Disclaimer:  The following text is a satire, and should not be given any other meaning.

Hello hello what the hell
I cannot hear a word
Because my cellphone’s volume
Is not a thousand megawatt
Wha-wha-what’s the point of bringing it in here?
I guess I cannot help it If I’m kinda thick
K-K-kinda thick
K-K-kinda thick
I’m as deep as paper, and as sharp as a brick

I have no idea I can shut down my phone
Or put it into silent mode and dance all night long
Instead I keep complaining when the calls are coming in
Like it’s someone else’s fault my mind is air thin

Stop callin’ Stop callin’
My tiny brain is gonna explode
All I can do is dance like a whore now
Stop callin’ Stop callin’
I’m gonna reach overload
I shake my ass, tease, and think I am special

E-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e
We’ve been reduced to using vowels
e-e-e-u-u-u-u
Just like monkeys
e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e
Now I’m only using vowels
e-e-e-u-u-u-u
Just like monkeys

My IQ is so low, it hit rock bottom
This song says I can’t use my own cellphone
All the time in the club, like a worthless slob
And I can’t figure out my own cellphone
My IQ is so low, it hit rock bottom
This song says I can’t use my own cellphone
All the time in the club, like a worthless slob
And I can’t figure out my own cellphone

It’s time for some cheap gangsta stuff
I’ll call you boy and think I’m tough
Act like a slave master
Deride you like a bastard
They really should’ve locked me home
My grammar’s a disaster
Talking like a second grader
Sorry, I can do no better

Some people have zero friends
I have too many
Coz I’m a huge slut who sleeps with everrrrybody
I carry more diseases than a third world country
And every lowlife scumbag has been inside me

Has been inside me
Has been inside me
Every six-packed moron has been inside me

Stop callin’ Stop callin’
My tiny brain is gonna explode
All I can do is dance like a whore now
Stop callin’ Stop callin’
I’m gonna reach overload
I shake my ass, tease, and think I am special
Stop callin’ Stop callin’
My tiny brain is gonna explode
All I can do is dance like a whore now
Stop callin’ Stop callin’
I’m gonna reach overload
I shake my ass, tease, and think I am special

E-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e
We’ve been reduced to using vowels
e-e-e-u-u-u-u
Just like monkeys
E-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e
Now I’m only using vowels
e-e-e-u-u-u-u
Just like monkeys

My IQ is so low, it hit rock bottom
This song says I can’t use my own cellphone
All the time in the club, like a worthless slob
And I can’t figure out my own cellphone
My IQ is so low, it hit rock bottom
This song says I can’t use my own cellphone
All the time in the club, like a worthless slob
And I can’t figure out my own cellphone
My own cellphone
Ma ma my own cellphone
All the time in the club, like a worthless slob
And I can’t figure out my own cellphone
My own cellphone
Ma ma my own cellphone
All the time in the club, like a worthless slob
And I can’t figure out my own cellphone

I’m sorry, the number you have dialed belongs to a stupid spoiled whore…

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